Sorry if it becomes rant-ish but i’m trying to include as much detail as i can so pls read all. Think i could use some advice. Am young so not much wisdom, especially in regards to sex which this stems from Kicked off around 12-14 months ago. Girlfriend of a better part of a year said lets go straight to sex (bypassing other sexual acts). Went badly, couldn’t get it up, happened a few more times. Was first few times trying to have sex. I believe this was due to us not being comfortable with each other, with sexual acts in general (hence bypassing), and rushing into it when we were kinda apprehensive at heart. This combined with the cycle of performance anxiety caused it to happen again and again with her. Although it eventually got better as we got more comfortable with everything, but then there were other hurdles to jump with her this time that aren’t worth getting into. But before these all these hurdles could be jumped we broke up because of me getting cheated on repeatedly (cucboi i know). Days pass and i’m able to deal with the break up but the sexual fuck ups and events linger with me and has been bugging me ever since in some form. Initially it bugged me as i thought there was something wrong with me, and feelings of inferiority and doubt about future situations mainly sexual, were on my mind a lot. Whenever something sexually suggestive would enter my mind it would be met with a wave of anxiety. Time went on and after failing to ignore it i did more research on performance anxiety etc etc, with me telling myself “well simply put if we don’t want to do something, don’t force yourself too” and other basic shit about keeping calm, and got more to grips with why it fucked up in the first place, which kinda calmed the anxiousness, but eventually it came back into the fold. Now as everyone is getting older and more mature, and sex becomes a more common normal thing to experience for people, the anxiousness has only increased. Things are always on my mind now, i think a lot about future situations where i’m gonna fuck up, about the need to just get out and overcome it and find someone to stick my dick in but how this would fuck up, about how i think i’m digging myself into a hole where i’m forever going to be too panicked to get it up, about how this kinda makes me inferior. I think i may stress about the future quite a bit anyway but who doesn’t This all drains from my confidence and charisma and i don’t like it. I’d like to think i’m a good person, iv'e definitely got a libido seeing as i beat my dick all the time, I’ve never had any real proper anxiety or mental health issues, maybe a perfectionist to a degree, quite socially conscious (never been terrible though, quite outgoing, but aren’t all young people socially conscious), wasn’t raised in a strict childhood, didn’t have a complete lack of sex ed. I just want to stop having my confidence and charisma drained by this retarded problem and live as a teenager, I’m not saying i want to become an animal under the sheets, i just want to be able to have experiences and not have anxiousness about them, i’m never going to get these years back once they are gone and i don’t want them dominated by anxiety. I also couldn’t really go for a long term gf as i have very little spare time, cash, and am probably moving from my city to a university in a year or so, not ruling relationships of some kinds out though Any advice would help, i just want to get something done about it, will answer any questions if need be. Apologies to people on here with more serious problems feels like i’m being insulting with this but i had no one else to ask, too embarrassed to do so Edit: btw pretty much quit porn by now too [link] [comments] Strange, Embarrassing, and Small but Lingering Problem that could use some Advice published first on https://neuroscientia.blogspot.com/ via Tumblr Strange, Embarrassing, and Small but Lingering Problem that could use some Advice
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